How is your libido in these times? And does your partner still really want to have sex with you? How to get really hot for each other again
What is libido?
The word libido comes from Latin and means “desire” or “craving”. In a figurative sense, it stands for sexual desire. Sexual desire is expressed differently in each person – nevertheless, external influences can strengthen or weaken the libido.
What influences the libido?
1. hormones: ambassadors of sexual desire.
First and foremost, hormones play a major role when it comes to our libido. Hormones control various processes in the body and are also responsible for sexual desire. In men, the sex hormone testosterone, among others, ensures that the desire for sex increases. A testosterone deficiency can therefore have a negative effect on libido. You can tell whether you are suffering from a deficiency by these signs.
But women also contain a small amount of the male sex hormone – yet their sexuality is also influenced by the female sex hormone estrogen. In addition to the sex hormones, the happiness hormone dopamine, among other things, ensures that your libido increases. This messenger substance is produced especially in newly in love couples.
2. age
With increasing age, the libido also dwindles. And this basically has something to do with hormones again. Because the older you get, the less your body produces the hormones that are responsible for libido.
Lack of sleep, stress & Co.: What are lust killers?
It’s not just hormones and increasing age that can affect libido. Lack of sleep and general stress at work or in a partnership can also affect libido. In addition, too little sport and exercise in particular are absolute lust killers, because those who move little simply feel uncomfortable in their bodies. This can lead to a loss of self-confidence and a feeling of no longer being desirable.
Regular alcohol and nicotine consumption can also weaken the libido. Other lust killers can be caused by taking certain medications: Medications for depression, diabetes or high blood pressure, but also sleeping pills and tranquilizers can weaken libido.
(Mental) illnesses can also be to blame if the desire for sex wanes. Depression, high blood pressure, but also a general fear of sex – for example due to a traumatic experience – are often found to be the reason for a weakened libido.
Last but not least, your environment also determines whether you feel like having sex: unwashed laundry next to the bed or the TV in the bedroom can create a negative mood. By the way: According to research, couples who have a TV in their bedroom have only half as much sex as those without a TV next to the bed. Ergo: ban the flickering lust killer from the bedroom immediately if you still prefer sex to a series marathon.
What is a libido disorder? How can I tell that my sexuality is disturbed?
If a person has no desire for sex for a long time or recurrently, it is called a libido disorder. In this case, one also speaks of the so-called libido deficiency, which can increase to libido loss. In this condition, the affected person has no desire for sex at all.
A libido disorder is only really referred to when the desire is absent for a period of at least 6 months. Sometimes there is also a feeling of distress in the affected person. Depending on how pronounced such a lack of libido is, one can also speak of a general sexual disorder.
How can I increase my desire naturally?
Men who suffer from a loss of libido are quick to turn to medications such as the sexual enhancer Viagra. However, there are also natural ways to increase sexual desire – which, by the way, can also work for women.
1. use natural aphrodisiacs
Yes, they really do exist – natural remedies that boost the desire for sex. For example, ginseng works wonders – the root of the Asian plant promotes blood flow to the sexual organs and increases libido. Yohimbine, a substance from the leaves and bark of the yohimbe tree, also stimulates sex drive. And while artichokes cause the release of the female pleasure hormone estrogen, strawberries stimulate the production of testosterone. Ginger and chili can also light a small fire in the body – they have just as stimulating an effect as salmon. Salmon releases the happiness hormone dopamine. Extra tip: Your sweetheart can literally become a (sex) grenade: Make her a fruit salad with lots of pomegranate! This food – very healthy to boot – is considered a true testosterone booster.
2. do more sports
Whether it’s jogging, yoga or strength training, doing more sports and keeping your body in shape makes you feel better. Plus, exercising releases the sex hormone testosterone.
3. more sleep for better sex
To keep your libido from falling asleep, you should get enough sleep. Sounds paradoxical, but you need to be fit for lovemaking. Several studies show that enough sleep gives you more energy and concentration. Conversely, this means that you are fitter and have more desire for sex.
Female lust: 3 tips on how to increase your partner’s libido.
It is often said that women in particular are affected by a lack of sexual desire. Sometimes some women are even called frigid – that is, cold to the touch and difficult to arouse sexually. The reasons for frigidity can be physical, psychological or medication-related: pain during sex, a general fear of sex or taking the estrogen-containing birth control pill are just a few examples. Ignite your loved one’s sex drive with these 3 pretty simple tricks:
1. communication is key
Talk about your desires. Only when you know what she wants, you can also respond to her preferences and increase the desire for sex on both sides. That doesn’t mean you have to talk up your love life. You are not a friend of big words? Then ask your partner to watch her masturbate. If she’s willing to engage in this little experiment, you’ll be amazed at how much you can learn and benefit from her.
2. show her that you desire her.
Make it clear to her that you can’t get enough of her. Show her that you find her attractive and make her feel secure and confident. This can give her more confidence and actually increase sex drive as well. If you feel desired, you move confidently and relaxed and can simply let go better; also and especially in bed.
3. foreplay with massages
Touching, such as massages, releases the so-called cuddle hormone oxytocin. The hormone is known to increase sexual desire. Moreover, touch releases additional happiness hormones, which also have a positive effect on libido.
Nowadays, problems with libido in men are fortunately no longer taboo. In times of Viagra, for example, more and more men talk to their psychologist about difficulties with sexual intercourse. Before you reach into the medicine cabinet or spend a lot of money: With our tips, you can rekindle your libido or your partner’s sex drive in a completely natural way.
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